The Wastebucket : walmart

Top 5 Commercials that Should be Shot in the Head and Buried in a Shallow Grave

Raikus — Fri, 05 Dec 2008 16:50:00 GMT

Here's a top 5 list of commercials that should have been killed during the testing phase, but somehow made it to our televisions to aggravate us and make us hate the products that they're advertising.

#5 - Mucinex: All of Them

Visit the site to see the media.

I never grasped why animating bodily fluids would seem like a good idea. There's this thing that humanity has created for situations like this -- it's called subtlety. You don't have to create a snot monster and render him in 3D like a damned Pixar character. You just tip-toe around the subject with terms like "it will have you breathing clearer" and "for a fresh, deep breath," not "Mucinex in. Mucus out." That's just nasty. Have some damned manners, will you? Not only do these commercials offend audibly, but visually as well. Oh how sweet. A family of mucus slime. That's just something you can get behind. See? That's my subtle way of saying the people who made these commercials deserve a free lobotomy.

#4 - Walmart: Carol of the Bells

Visit the site to see the media.

Riiiiight. Have you ever seen an enthusiastic Walmart employee? One that even bothers to smile when you look at them? Almost every register worker I've seen is to lazy to turn their light on to begin with, let alone figure out the timing and synchronization necessary to "play" their register light to music. Not to mention, have you ever seen so many lanes open? I never understood why Walmart had 57 register lanes in every store when the most they ever have open is six. Is it for fire hazard reasons? Or because they have no other place to put 53 metric tons of Tic Tacs and bubble gum? You could show me a video of a monkey building a spaceship and flying it to a banana-shaped planet and I'd believe it before I believed Walmart employees could actually do this.

#3 - E*Trade: Baby Vomit

Visit the site to see the media.

I'd love to have been a fly on the wall during this concept meeting.

"You see, the baby talks about how easy it is to buy stocks and then... he throws up all over himself!

"Wow, Fred, that's amazing. Because ratings have show people love nothing more than seeing baby's projectile vomit!"

"I know, let's air it during the Superbowl!"

The only reason I don't list this is the #1 most offensive spot is because there are a few people that actually like it. They think it's cute. I guess because it has a baby. Because if I replace the baby with, oh, I don't know, Danny Devito and filmed this spot I guarantee no one would think it was cute. In fact, I'm pretty sure watching Danny Devito puke all over himself would get this taken off the air of most networks. WHO WANTS TO SEE THIS? Throw up? Really? Is this puke you can believe in? Should there be such a thing?

No. No is the correct answer here.

#2 - Toyota: Saved by Zero

Visit the site to see the media.

Ugh. There hasn't been such a quickly hated commercial as this since Head On ~~(apply directly to the forehead)~~. First, the song is awful. Second, they play the chorus four times in the spot. Third, they bought a sports package so large that it rivals the actual sport broadcast. If you're a fan of football you can count on hearing this stupid commercial during every team timeout and referee review. It's insane. I have to praise the media buyer on this one. Good job. You definitely know how to place your media. To the creative team who developed this spot, all I can say is BURN IN HELL YOU NO TALENT HACKS! You've caused actual suffering, mental anguish and damage. The way our litegious society is going I'll probably be able to class-action sue you in three years. Just get ready because few people have escaped being annoyed by this commercial. Your comeupance will soon be at hand.

#1 - AT&T: Talking Thumbs

Visit the site to see the media.

Oh God. Oh God! OH GOD MY EYES!

If you can get past the bad concept (Thumb Wars anyone?), and the horrible stereotyping (a black guy, geek, emo girl, slacker and airhead -- really AT&T?) there's still the absolutely vomit-inducing quips (maybe the E*Trade baby was listening to this while purchasing stocks). "That's insanium in the cranium, dog." I just want everyone to know that it actually hurt typing that. Really, my left hand is cramping with shame. It baffles me how commercials like this actually get made. Where are the Dan Drapers to step in and snuff out these ideas like a smoked cigarette? No one stepped up and just said "this idea is dumb" during the entire process? Is there no quality-control left in the work?!

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If you have other suggestions for commercials you hate, post them in the thread. I'd love to develop a top 10 list in the next week or so.

Black Friday Deals 2008 - The Best Deals Out There

Raikus — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 16:56:00 GMT

I've compiled a list of some of the best deals in multiple categories. This year's "must go" store winners are Best Buy and Circuit City. The sales trend seems to be HDTVs, GPS and digital camera with a disappointing turnout for laptop, desktop and MP3 deals.

*It's important to note that some Black Friday deals from stores like Wal-Mart, Sam's, HH Gregg, and a few others weren't available at the time of this post. I will update the post when they do become available. Enjoy!

Plasma HDTV
Best Buy - Samsung 42" 720p Plasma HDTV - $699.99
Circuit City - Samsung 42" Widescreen 720p Plasma HDTV (Model # PN42A400) - $699.99
Circuit City - Samsung 50" Widescreen Plasma HDTV (Model # PN50A400) - $899.99
Sears - Samsung 50" 720p PN50A400 Plasma HDTV - $899.99

LCD HDTV
Best Buy - Samsung 40" Class 1080P LCD HDTV - $799.99
Sears - Samsung 40" 1080P LCD HDTV - $799.99
Sears - Toshiba 40" 1080p 40RV525U LCD HDTV - $849.99
Circuit City - Sony 40" Widescreen 1080p LCD HDTV (Model # KDL40S4100) - $899.99
Circuit City - Panasonic 42" Widescreen 1080p LCD HDTV (Model # TH42PZ80U) - $899.99
Dell Home - Sharp 42" 1080p LCD HDTV - $779.00
Best Buy - Insignia 47" 1080P LCD HDTV - $999.99
Circuit City - Samsung 46" Widescreen 1080p LCD HDTV (Model # LN46A500) - $1,099.99

GPS
Target - Garmin nuvi 200W GPS Navigation System - $119.99
Best Buy - Garmin Nuvi 205 GPS - $119.99
Circuit City - Garmin nuvi 260 3.5" GPS Navigation System - $149.99
Best Buy - Garmin Nuvi 260W GPS System - $189.99
Circuit City - TomTom One 125 GPS Navigation System - $99.99
Radio Shack - TomTom One 125 GPS - $99.99
Best Buy - TomTom Go 720 GPS - $249.99

Digital Camera
Circuit City - Samsung S860 8MP Digital Camera w/ 3x Zoom - $79.99
Radio Shack - Samsung 10.2MP L200 Digital Camera - $99.99
Dell Home - Canon Powershot SD1100 8MP 3x Zoom Digital Camera - $159.99
Radio Shack - Canon 8MP SD 1100 Digital Camera - $179.99
Best Buy - Canon Powershot 10MP SD790IS Digital Camera - $199.99
Best Buy - Sony Cyber-shot T300 10MP Digital Camera - $299.99
Circuit City - Sony Cyber-shot DSC-W170 10.1-Megapixel Digital Camera - $259.99
Sears - Canon Rebel XS DSLR Digital Camera Rebel XS - $679.98
Best Buy - Canon EOS Rebel XSi D-SLR 12MP Camera - $699.99

MP3
Target - Apple iPod Nano 8GB MP3 Player w/ Free $15 Gift Card - $145.00
Best Buy - 8GB iPod Nano - $149.99 w/Free $20 GC
Circuit City - Apple iPod nano 16GB MP3 Player w/ Free $15 iTunes Card - $199.99

Vacuum
K-Mart - iRobot Roomba 405 Robotic Vacuum With Bonus Remote Control - $99.99
Sears - Dyson DC25 All Floors Vacuum - $399.99

Portable DVD Player
Target - RCA 7" Portable Widescreen DVD Player - $49.00
Target - TruTech 7" Dual-Screen Portable DVD Player - $88.00
Sears - GPX 8" Portable DVD Player w/USB & SD - $119.99
Sears - Magnavox 7" Dual Screen Portable DVD Player - $149.99

Blu-Ray Player
K-Mart - Sony Blu-Ray Disc Player - $179.99
Best Buy - Samsung Blu-Ray Player - $199.99
Circuit City - Samsung Blu-Ray Disc Player BDP1500 - $199.99

Laptop
Toshiba AMD Turion 64 X2 Dual-Core Notebook Computer w/3GB Memory, 160GB Hard Drive - $379.99 *

External Hard Drive
Target - Western Digital 750GB USB 2.0 External Hard Drive - $88.88
Best Buy - Western Digital 1TB My Book Home Edition External Hard Drive - $149.99

Memory
Best Buy - PNY 2 GB PC5300 DDR2 Notebook/Desktop Memory Kit - $34.00

Chip Storage
Circuit City - SanDisk 4GB Secure Digital High Capacity (SDHC) Card - $12.99
Best Buy - Sandisk 4GB SD Card - $14.99
Circuit City - SanDisk 8GB Secure Digital High Capacity (SDHC) Card - $19.99

USB Drive
Circuit City - SanDisk 4GB USB 2.0 Flash Drive - $9.99
Best Buy - Sandisk 4GB USB Flash Drive - $12.99
Circuit City - SanDisk 8GB Cruzer Micro USB Flash Drive - $18.99
Best Buy - Sandisk 8GB USB Flash Drive - $19.99

Wireless Routers
Radio Shack - Netgear Super-G 802.11G Wireless Router - $29.99
Circuit City - Linksys RangePlus Wireless Router - $39.99
Best Buy - Linksys RangePlus Wireless G MIMO Router - $39.99
Circuit City - D-Link Wireless-N Router w/ Free Adapter - $39.99
Best Buy - Netgear Wireless N Router - $49.99
Circuit City - Netgear Wireless-N Router - $49.99

Home Theater
Circuit City - Samsung HT-Z310 5.1 Dolby and DTS Home Theater System - $149.99
Sears - Samsung 1000 Watt Home Theater System - $159.99
Best Buy - Sony 7.1-Channel 735-Watt Home Theater Receiver - $199.99
Circuit City - Sony STR-DG720 7.1 Dolby and DTS Home Theater Receiver - $199.99

DVD Deals (TV)
Best Buy - Entourage Seasons 1, 2 or 3 DVD Box Sets - $9.99
Circuit City - 30 Rock Season 1 - $14.99
Circuit City - CSI Miami Season 1, 2, 3, or 4 - $14.99
Circuit City - Family Guy Volume I, II, III, IV, or V - $14.99
Circuit City - House Seasons 1, 2, or 3 - $14.99
Circuit City - How I Met Your Mother Season 1 or 2 - $14.99
Circuit City - It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia Seasons 1 and 2 - $14.99
Circuit City - Mad Men Season 1 - $12.99
Circuit City - Nip/Tuck Season 1, 2, 3, or 4 - $14.99
Circuit City - Smallville Season 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, or 6 - $14.99
Circuit City - South Park Season 1, 2, 3, or 4 - $9.99
Circuit City - Supernatural Season 1 or 2 - $14.99
Circuit City - The Simpsons Season 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 9, or 10 - $14.99
Circuit City - Weeds Season 1, 2, or 3 - $12.99

Consoles
Best Buy - Sony Playstation 3 80GB Package w/Ratchet and Clank Future Game + Casino Royale Blu-ray - $399.99
Circuit City - Xbox 360 Arcade Holiday Bundle w/ Extra Controller & 20GB HD - $199.99
Circuit City - Xbox 360 Pro Holiday Bundle w/ 2 Games & Free $30 Gift Card - $299.99
Best Buy - XBox 360 60GB Console w/4 Games (Lego Indiana Jones, Kung Fu Panda, NBA 2K9, Tony Hawk's Proving Ground) - $299.99
Circuit City - Ice Blue Nintendo DS With Free Brain Age Game And Carrying Case - $139.99
Circuit City - Mario Red Nintendo DS With Free Super Mario Brothers Game - $139.99

Video Games
Best Buy - The Simpsons Game for XBox 360 - $9.99
Circuit City - Bioshock Xbox 360 Video Game - $19.99
Circuit City - Guitar Hero Aerosmith Bundle for Nintendo Wii/Xbox 360 - $59.99
Circuit City - Guitar Hero III Bundle for Playstation 3/Xbox 360 - $54.99
Circuit City - Guitar Hero on Tour for Nintendo DS - $29.99
Circuit City - World of Warcraft Battle Chest PC Game - $14.99
Target - Guitar Hero World Tour Guitar Bundle for Nintendo Wii - $59.00
Target - Xbox Live Gold 3-Month Card - $15.00

Christmas Trees
K-Mart - Martha Stewart Everyday Holiday 7.5" Pre-lit Trees - $149.99
K-Mart - Trim A Home 6.5' pre-lit Pine Tree - $79.99
K-Mart - Trim A Home 6" Mount Washington Pre-Lit Tree - $49.99
Lowes - 6-1/2' 400-Light Clear Pre-Lit Christmas Tree - $38.00
Lowes - 6-1/2 ft. Seneca Pre-Lit Christmas Tree - $78.00
JCPenney - 7-1/2ft Prelit Vancouver Pine Tree - $118.88

Electric Razors
Sears - Phillips Norelco 6940 Reflex Action Men's Shaving System - $19.99
CVS - Norelco Electric Razor with Precision Cutting System - $28.99
Sears - Philips Norelco 7315 Men's Shaver - $29.99
Target - Norelco Electric Shaver - $29.99
Circuit City - Panasonic Vortex Wet/Dry Shaver with Hydraclean System - $79.99

Bikes
K-Mart - 20" Boys' Mongoose X-Jump Bike - $74.99
K-Mart - Evolution Front Suspension Mountain Bikes - $68.88

Black Friday Deals 2008 - Your Game Plan

Raikus — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 14:41:00 GMT

It's that wonderful time of year again. The weather is cooling, people are getting into the giving mood and businesses are trying to turn their numbers from red to black. That means that it's the season for great deals! I've been a Black Friday fan for about a decade now. I buy about 70% of my electronics, gifts and upgrades during the "Day After Thanksgiving" sales. So if I can divulge a bit of my knowledge to help some other people get great deals (as long as you're not getting in line before me) I'll be happy to do so.

Preparation. The first step, as it usually goes, is preparation. Don't wait to pick up the Thanksgiving Day paper to learn what deals are out there -- do it now. There are some great sites out there for Black Friday Deals. My personal favorites are www.keepcash.com and www.theblackfriday.com. These sites are dedicated to getting a hold of the Black Friday deals before their published and letting you know what they are. Do your research here and it will pay off in time and dollars in the future. Make a list of what items you're looking for and begin comparing. Remember that it's not important to just pay attention to the item and the price, be aware of which stores have the most products you're looking for. Because the next step is...

Planning. I'm not going to give you some metaphor for Black Friday shopping/shoppers but if I were it would most likely involve war, blood and mass casualties. Black Friday is serious business. Even if you don't think so, there are thousands of middle aged housewives who live for this day and God forbid you get between them and their prized item. At best you'll lose a finger at worst... well, rest in peace Jimmy. Planning is essential in guaranteeing that you get the most of what you're wanting in the quickest time and with the least loss of life. Identify the opening times for the stores on your list. Most likely you'll have 2 or 3 tiers of opening times. Wal-Mart traditionally opens at the insane time of 4AM for their Black Friday. Best Buy and Target probably won't be open until 6AM. If you want one of the "door buster" deals then you'll want to get in line before the store opening. However, as fun as it is to camp on bare concrete and maybe see you're cold, sniveling face on the mid-day news, I've always fancied showing up after the doors have opened. Unless you're at the head of the line (re: you got there at 9PM Thanksgiving night) the chances of you getting the item are roughly the same as you showing up after they open. There's a handy formula for figuring out what time to show up to a store. It's (desire for product) divided by (value of sleep) times (savings on product) minus (public appeal of product) equals (time to show up at store). In layman's, don't show up at 10AM and expect to get that 50" plasma for $700.

Revision. No matter how good the plan that you've put together is, there will always be factors that change it. Maybe the Circuit City you went to is out of their Western Digital 1 TB external hard drives. Perhaps Wal-Mart ran out of SD chips for a dollar. Maybe apes have taken over the local Best Buy. Whatever the situation you're going to have to roll with the punches. Have a backup plan. If there are similar products at multiple stores, make sure you take note of them. If the first store doesn't have them, know which store has the next better deal. This may even change your store-hopping order. Just be prepared because it most likely will happen.

Time. Always be aware of your time. Chances are the deals will be gone by 11AM. That gives you about 5 hours of time to run around and scoop up what you can. Recently, many stores have been doing "early bird" internet-only deals. Last year, Circuit City had some really fabulous deals. Most were on par or slightly more than the instore deals. Keep an eye out for these. Some may even be available Thanksgiving Day. Cross everything off your list online that you can and it will save you hours of time and aggrovation.

Here is a compilation list of the best Black Friday Deals out there for 2008. Take a look!