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September 2007 - Posts
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There really has been amazing stability of the idea of happiness across time. We still believe, for instance, in the social-comparison hypothesis, the idea that happiness is a function of the perceived gap between what we have and what we think others have. And the original concept goes all the way back to Aristotle.
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Contrary to popular opinion, there is only a somewhat modest correlation between income and happiness, but it is much less so than people imagines. Material items are also way overrated. But one of the most remarkable things, I think, is that the definition, in my mind, of happiness hasn’t changed much. People have always needed a portfolio of interest in their loves. And if you look at the description of what makes people happy, they’ve remained incredibly similar over the years: healthy bodies, good, productive jobs, love, family, friend. And, on the internal side contentment, piece of mind, satisfaction.
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Why do we feel guilty
Psychology and psychiatry have never lacked for
explanations of guilt. Earlier views held it arose from fear of castration,
fear of separation from the mother, or from a repressed wish to be punished.
Guilt
should be consider as a kind of social glue rather than a product of the
individual psyche. Its roots lie in empathy, or an individual’s ability to feel
the pain of others, and fear of alienation by the social group
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Bullies pick on boys with a generally submissive behavioral style, kids who give up their position or place at the drop of a hat. They give in because they lack common social skills. But in doing so, they reinforce the bully’s behavior by rewarding him.
That not only sets them up for further, and worse, abuse, it makes them unpopular. No one may like a bully, but no one likes a chronic victim, either.
Unless victims learn social skills, they are at risk of developing behavior problems.
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September 12 2007
Our need to evolve
Because in
a world where virtually the only constant is change, you can pretty much bet on
this, that none of yesterday’s assumptions are safe today. If we are living,
breathing, intelligent creatures and we heed the feedback we get from the
world, over time we can’t help but to be ready to shift our goals, our
strategies and our beliefs to better adapt to a changing world. Nevertheless we
ought to leave and structure of core values relatively unchanged.
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