The Gas Light Effect
What is the gas light effect?
There are many kinds of abuse that one can endure. Some occur more blatantly than others. Gaslighting is more psychological than physical. As someone I know put it, "it's like hitting someone with a bag of oranges". You can't tell that someone is being abused, but the damage is there internally. This form of abuse is making someone believe that their own reality isn't so. As these denials build up they make the victim progressively anxious, confused, and less able to trust his or her own memory and perception. Another variation may include constant harassment that subtly alters aspects of a victims environment. This may upset his or her peace of mind and sense of security ultimately eroding their reality.
I bring this up to make a point. Although many consider this a form of abuse, it is not widely known or even acted upon. The fact that it is so subtle to everyone around, makes it very hard to point out unless you are a victim that has, for some reason or another, been brought into the light. The effects of this abuse can be life altering. I speak from experience when I say that if you have been hurt by the gas light effect, reality can alter your thoughts about life itself and whether it's even worth living. People tend to use this method to manipulate another person so that they may control their life with out being forceful. Because of the subtle clues and major damages that occur, this is one of the worst ways someone can abuse another person.
Gaslighting takes two. One person who needs to be in control to maintain his/her sense of self, and the other, who needs the relationship to maintain his/her sense of self and is willing to acquiesce. Just as there are many ways to break a horse so that you can ride it wherever you wish, there are many ways to break a person as well.