Now that I've lived in this town for about nine months, I have finally started to develop my network of friends. Well sure, I've had friends since I moved here, but I'm talking about a real group of friends...you know, the kinds of friends that you don't mind hanging out with every day, because you have a lot of fun and it's no stress and no hassle. You can just get together and chat, have dinner, play a board game, even just watch television or a movie and have a drink...really low stress. I've got a few friends who are approaching this category. We pretty much get together consistently every day just for the sake of getting together. We have a great time and there are always plenty of laughs to be had. There is really only one problem with this developing friendship, but it's really not something that needs to be a problem. As you all know, I work a lot, and as a result I make a fair share of money, meaning that I usually have extra money in my checking account to do extra things and have fun. I can get dinner or buy non store brand groceries, you know...not the important essentials, but I get by comfortably. This is unfortunately not really the case for my two friends in particular that I've been talking about. They happen to be roommates, and share a lot of the financial responsibilities of having their apartment. They are several years younger than I am, still in their undergraduate years, and they just simply don't have any experience with financial responsibility yet. I can remember myself somewhat in the same situation back when I was their age...which was so so so long ago. Anyways, this financial discrepancy thing is not a problem for me and my roommate in the least. We never think of ourselves as having extra money. We just have what we have, and we spend it on what we need to when we need to. Since we usually have a little bit extra floating around, we like to take people out for dinner or drinks or buy cool things when we visit or get invited over. This is where we are running into the problems. Our friends who I was talking about above are a little "funny" when it comes to the fact that we have money. The other day I ended up bringing groceries for dinner over to their place to cook, and the whole time I heard one of them saying..."we're going to pay you back, don't worry", or "i promise we'll cook next time". Very unnecessary but sort of understandable things to say. I tried to explain that it didn't really need to work like that. If I didn't want to buy the groceries and cook, I wouldn't do it. I also explained that I am well aware of their financial situation, and I am not concerned in the least about being paid back or having my dinner-making night reciprocated. His response was one of concern, because he didn't want me and my roommate to think that they were looking for handouts. Of course I assured him that this was not a handout, but rather just something that friends do for other friends...I even said that he could think of the dinner as a gift or something...just anything that didn't make him feel guilty or bad.

I'm sad to admit that the situation hasn't really improved all that much in the last few days. They have really made an effort to try to repay my roommate and I in their own little way. It is really very sweet and it is much appreciated, but I'm just at a point where I don't know what to do about it anymore. I don't want to make them feel awkward or insufficient, but I also don't want them to think that they have to repay us everytime we do something that costs money. So, as you see, at this point in our budding friendship, we have a slight awkwardness, but it's one that we are working through. The complicating matter of course is that our one difficulty relates to money...a subject mostly taboo due to the stigma and pride issues attached to have too much or too little money. I'm just praying that we all find a way to work out an understanding, because this issue seems to be the only thing holding back a really great friendship among the four of us from taking place.