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May 2006 - Posts

  • Hiding Papers: Thanks Congressman Jefferson

    I don't understand what the big fuss is over Congressman Jefferson's rights. I read in the Washington Post that a big to-do is being made over the Constitutionality of the search and seizure. Ok, if they had found NOTHING then I can see why people would be upset. But people voted this *** into office, he took bribes and then was CAUGHT shoving papers around and hiding money in his fridge. I know, I know, I'm a bleeding-heart liberal. I believe the Justice Department performed due dilligence. They've never raided anyone I know despite some unscrupulous activity--and there's any number of people they could bust. They could break up our weekly poker game and take our $40 pot. But they don't because we haven't done anything to make them suspicous. If we did then we would get our asses busted just like Congressman Jefferson. Laws are in place to make us ask if the risk is worth the reward. For me, seeing my friends and sometimes taking their money is enough reward to make up for the risk of going to jail for gambling. Apparently for Congressman Jefferson the reward of hundreds of thousands of dollars was worth the risk of this happening. It happened. It's not like he was ignorant to the situation. Sure he didn't want to get caught but I would say it's safe to assume most criminals have no desire to get caught. The Justice Department did what they were supposed to do and now we have a Congressman, face caked in ***, all over the news because not only did he do stupid things multiple times but was dumb enough to get caught. He's not allowed to come play poker with us.
    Posted May 31 2006, 01:57 PM by greysanatomy with no comments
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  • Theme Parks

    Man, I hated theme parks when I was little. I still hate them now, although I do enjoy the roller coasters. I just don't understand how seeing someone in a Wiley E. Coyote costume is to somehow enhance any experience of my life. Even when I was little I was able to put two and two together to realize it was just some pedophile in a costume. The only theme park we had even remotely close to my house was Six Flags Great America: Chicago (or whatever the stupid theme park was called). I remembered I was dating this girl named Meghan and I was a total wimp. I was scared of the roller coasters that went upside-down so I concoted this story that when I was in middle school a friend of mine had fallen out (screw you physics!) and ergo I refused to go the ones that went upside-down. She seemed to believe it and I happily went on the normal ones with her. I can't remember when I stopped use the Theme Park Lie (herein TPL) but it was probably longer than I care to remember. If it's any consolation, and I know it's not, I'll happily go on any roller coaster now, Wiley E. Coyote theme park or not. And I know I won't fall out.
    Posted May 30 2006, 01:34 PM by greysanatomy with no comments
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  • Theme Party Ideas

    If you're going to have a Theme Party I think the least you can do is not require guests to go out and spend their hard-earned money on a stupid costume that going to sit in the their closet until their next garage sale. You should incorporate easy dress into the party. Here are some ideas: Hawaiian Theme Party: Everyone (sadly) owns at least one "Hawaiian" shirt. Call your local university and ask if they have a steel drum band (not that steel drums have anything to with Hawaii but you might as well further stereotypes). You can probably hire one for about $150/hr. Get some tiki torches and roast a large animal. Plastic leis go a long way too. Someone Else Theme Party: If all your friends have a good sense of humor (mine do not) you can assign each person to dress as another guest you will know will be at the party. If you're feeling especially ambitious you can make everyone act as the other person the whole night. Although when it comes time for the party to be over make sure you don't have any couple-swapping. Unless that's what the party was for. Money Limit Theme Party" It's essentially a pot-luck dinner however there are more rules. First of all, each person cannot wear more than $20 worth of clothes. Secondly, the food they bring for the pot luck dinner had to have been made only with items found in the maker's house at the time. You are not allowed to go out and buy anything to make this meal. Sometimes a smart-ass will bring ice but that's ok.
    Posted May 29 2006, 01:33 PM by greysanatomy with no comments
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  • Led Zeppelin Theme Party: Aftermath

    Led Zeppelin has been my favorite band for as long as I can remember. That said, spending seven hours doing nothing but listening to them might have been a little much. I knew the end was going to suck but I didn't realize how badly it was going to suck. I knew Coda was going to be bad but I had forgotten just how pedestrian it is. And the second disc of Physical Graffiti...ouch. Except for Trampled Underfoot and Ten Years Gone that album is a total waste. There was discussion about starting from the end and working backwards to Led Zeppelin I but I figured everyone would be too drunk and tired to notice how good it was. We tried to make the end better by replaying Led Zeppelin II and III but I think by that point everyone wanted to go home. So when you're trying to come up with a creative theme party that's based around a musical group I'd pick one with a less extensive catalog...like Kelly Clarkson.
    Posted May 28 2006, 02:36 PM by greysanatomy with no comments
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  • Led Zeppelin Theme Party

    I guess it's not really a theme party so much as a bunch of my friends sitting around, drinking beer and listening the entire studio albums of Led Zeppelin back to back to back (etc). We're expecting about 12 people or so (read: all my friends) and we're going to be grilling out. As you enter your late 20's and 30's you start to realize that there are fewer and fewer events that will naturally bring your friends out so you have to start inventing them. Of course we have our weekly Poker Championship Series but soon our small group of no more than eight will be our smaller group of no more than four. It's kind of sad. So anyway, it's Led Zeppelin night and god willing no will dress up as Robert Plant. The thought of a tightly denim-wrapped hot dog isn't really the point of the evening. I reburned all their CDs so I wouldn't have to change discs every hour and their ten albums fit nicely onto 6 CDs if you don't mind having weird groupings. I hope all goes well--I even cleaned my bathroom.
    Posted May 27 2006, 07:22 PM by greysanatomy with no comments
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  • Human Anatomy

    The human body is really amazing. Although I am not a doctor I feel I can safely say this as someone who was forced to do 240 push-ups in about a 45 minute time span yesterday. I started take karate so I could safely beat up people in bars. Not that I would ever start a fight but I admit that I like the thought I can end a fight relatively easily. Let me tell you about doing 240 push-ups. After about 100 your shoulders ache but not nearly as bad as your hands and wrists do from holding your body up. I'm not a big man either--I only weigh 170. After about 150 your body starts to tingle. And not where you might expect. Apparently the human anatomy is such that when the body is under duress to makes certain "groinular" areas spasm. No, I'm not talked about my "bits" per se but that general reason. And, to further clarify, it's not a pleasant tingling. Every push-up makes the spasms more intense and more painful. By 200 your vision starts to cloud and your whole body writhes. Obviously your arms are shaking like a coke fiend as well. I gave out at 240 and I'm pretty sure that had a doctor been present he would have declared me dead. It was only thinking of my sweet dog greysmusic that brought me back (awww).
    Posted May 26 2006, 03:41 PM by greysanatomy with no comments
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  • Enron founder Kenneth Lay convicted of all counts against him

    Enron Corp. founder Kenneth Lay has been convicted of all six counts against him, including conspiracy to commit securities and wire fraud. I guess that title says it all, eh? If we can't trust greedy, which white men who can we trust?
    Posted May 25 2006, 04:10 PM by greysanatomy with no comments
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  • ABC on HDTV

    I now have a dilemma. With a new freelance client about to pay me well into the five figures to do a two-month website I have a big choice to make. A few months ago one of my co-workers moved to Panama and I bought a nice armoir from her. It's about six feet tall, has lots of storage space. Very adult looking. It currently houses my 27" TV (barely) and a boatload of electronics. It's great. I'm good about saving. I really am. When I freelanced last year I did an excellent job of saving for a rainy day. However I've been poor for the past nine months and this new windfall will allow me to do something I haven't been able to do: buy something nice and expensive for myself. What I really want is one of those plasma HDTV's for my living room. When I was in Chicago visiting my parents for Christmas Best Buy had one of last year's models on clearance for about $2,000. 63" LCD. Wow. I didn't buy it of course. Anyway, now I have this dilemma. Of course I'm going to save at least $10,000 from this project. However, of the non-expenses payment do I dare treat myself to a huge TV that would only be used to watch two shows a week? Are Grey's Anatomy and Desperate Housewives really enough to merit spending thousands of hard-earning dollars? I could buy a new computer for that much or even put a down payment on a house. Who knows. I know nothing about TV's let alone the flat screen ones so maybe someone could leave a recommendation. While I do have three TVs in my house now I don't watch any of them except the 1980 Radiatation-A-Tron in my office. Jamie watches the one in my bedroom and when I have people over we watch the one in my living room. I might be more inclined to have people over to watch football and baseball games if I had the biggest TV. Yeah, TV.
    Posted May 25 2006, 01:37 PM by greysanatomy with no comments
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  • Grey's Anatomy Season 3 Predictions

    In the spirit of selling out I'd like to make my formal predictions for season three of Grey's Anatomy. So without further ado, let's get on with the predictions. Meredith: Who will Meredith choose? Neither. She's going to choose Finn to get through the rest of the evening and then continue to fill the void by getting with random guys. She's not going to change. Her character is representitive of all of us--no matter how badly we want to change we just can't. If she did then no one would sympathize with her character. She'll also probably find a way to split George up from Callie because she (Meredith) doesn't want anyone to be happy. And George, being the fool he is, will dump Callie. Derek (McDreamy): Who will McDreamy choose? He already chose Meredith--isn't that the gist of the first two seasons? He'll probably string Addison along because he's like that. Christina: She and Burke would get married except for the fact this is TV and something terrible must happen to at least one of them before Season 3 ends. Burke: He's dead. Someone's going to kill him for real. He's important enough to kill off but not too important that the show would stop. Izzy: She'll be back. If she didn't come back it wouldn't be TV. And people love her. She'll be back and probably get with George at some point. Addison: She's going to leave at the end of the season. Trust me. George: He's going to be bouncing from lonely girl to lonely girl this season. They might as well rename Season 3 to be Season 3: The Season of George. I just hope Callie doesn't kill him off. Callie: Maybe SHE'LL get with McDreamy to get back with George. Ooh.
    Posted May 24 2006, 02:08 PM by greysanatomy with no comments
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  • Veteran ID Theft

    After a profound entry on Schenkerian Analysis yesterday let's head back to the news. I read in the Washington Post this article about how 26.5 million veterans' information was stolen inadvertantly in a buglary. The employee that took the data home was placed on administrative leave. Oops. If I were the burglar I certainly would not be applying for credit cards in their names. It's way too easy to get caught. If I wanted to make a quick buck here's what I'd do. Hire a bunch of temporary employees to take those records and put them into a database. Then, when they were done, have them fill out a bunch of loan applications online where I was the "referrer" and am making $20/pop. Now, I don't have a degree in mathematics however I can tell you that 26.5m*$20 is about $530 million dollars. If I'm entering those referrals into more that one place (since apparently I'm unscrupulous enough to do this), likely 4, I'm now up to about $2 billion dollars. That would easily cover the amount of temporary employees needed to make this happen. I'd have about $750m after expenses and taxes left to stage much more complex burglaries such as rescuing Kandinsky's art from dull museums and sneaking it into ones where people would appreciate it. I also would take the money to start some sort of national organization against weaved baskets. I hate those things. I have no problem with crafts--quilting, painting, whatever. All of those are a-okay with me. But those stupid wicker baskets I always see at garage sales really bother me. Who even finds these charming? It'll probably take about $100m to stomp out Basket Making (NAABM [National Association Against Basket Making]) leaving me with a mere $650m left. Let's see now. I'm not sure how much it would cost but I'd hope to have enough to bribe U2 to stop playing. Ever again. I'd buy them an island, assuming I had enough money left, for them to be exiled. I'm guessing the price tag on that would be about $500m but to rid the world of U2 I think it would be money well spent. Now I'm down to $150m. I shouldn't have been so frivilous. I can't even buy a castle or anything at this point. At least not a good one. So a castle is out at this point. Hmmm, what else...I guess I could build a large statue of myself somewhere in Mexico where the labor is still cheap. I'd have to ask the sculptor (or would it be an architect? You can probably tell I've never had a statue of myself erected before) to make me a little less bald and a little more muscly. Maybe make my nose a little smaller. And my eyes less beady. They'd have to do it too because, hey, it's a $100m statue and no one is going to say no to that. At the base of this see-it-from-space statue would be 26.5m minature veterns all angry that I had the audicity to convert their data to loan applications and sell them online. It might hard to show the anger on their little faces but I'm sure it would get done.
    Posted May 23 2006, 02:09 PM by greysanatomy with no comments
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  • Schenkerian Analysis (Schenker Graphs!)

    In the last semester of my Masters Degree in Music Theory I had to take a class on schenkerian analysis. It was interesting but, in my most humble opinion, total and complete bullshit. I firmly agree that there are organicist elements in music. No doubt about it. Are they deliberate? Possibly. However, Schenker's graphs do not work all the time. What if counterpoint rules didn't work all the time? How good of rules would they be? Not very. I think music theorists get so hot and steamy for schenkerian analysis because they get to make graphs. 5-line...3-line...the elusive 8-line...but come on. I admit they are really fun to do and they look really impressive but the identifying structure tells us very little about the music itself. If all "good"music follows this organicist pattern then what differentiates one song from another? We only have twelve notes in the western scale so all the music is already structurally similar anyway--are some curvy lines really going to help redefine that anyway?
    Posted May 22 2006, 05:58 PM by greysanatomy with no comments
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  • Desperate Housewives Season Finale

    Before there was Grey's Anatomy, there was Desperate Housewives--the only show I ever watched. Season One was fantastic and Season Two was...a let down (to say the least). The DH Season Finale was true to the rest of the season--much ado about nothing. In case you happend to miss the season finale let me give you a breakdown of the individual stories: Bree: Escapes from the mental institution after getting a call Momma Applewhite saying her "normal" son (the one who had run away with Danielle) was a killer. She catches him and Danielle in their house. He's got a gun. Right as he's about to shoot her (Bree) the police shoot him dead. Betty had called the cops earlier. It gets more boring from here. Lynette: Finds out Tom was NOT cheating on her but in fact visiting the mother of his secret child. He knocked her up on a cruise ship eleven years ago and he just recently found out about the kid; hence all the trips to Atlantic City. She comes back to Wysteria Lane to get back child support and they fork over $30,000 which she promptly uses to put a down payment on a house down the street. The former stripper, who hates Lynette and visa-versa, is now going to be "part of the family". Susan: The crazy dentist was visiting a friend in the pysch hospital with Bree. Tensions rise between Carl and Mike since Carl catches Mike buying a ring for Susan. Susan finds out and plans a romantic evening to reverse-propose to Mike. Crazy dentist stalks Mike and hits him going about 40mph. This is the only cliff-hanging moment. Susan thinks Mike stood her up. Carl also bought Susan a house to remind Mike that he (Carl) is rich and Mike is not. Gabrielle: Finds out Carlos is indeed banging the housekeeper. Uh...is that it? Is their story that boring? Yes, yes it is. Mary Alice: Paul is in jail and asks Zack to see his "grandpa" to get money so he (Paul) can get a good lawyer. Grandad tells Zack he has no balls so Zack turns off the old man's machine o' life. Old man dies. Zack gets the old man's empire and blows off Paul who is currently begging him to get out of jail. And that's all folks.
    Posted May 22 2006, 03:39 AM by greysanatomy with no comments
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  • Buying Books Online

    I have a ton of books. I was in college for seven years so I have a ton of music books. Sadly, I do not read them anymore so I'm in the process of boxing them up. Now that I have all this ample space I figured I'd fill it with crap from Overture. One of my co-worker shops there all the time and is constantly raving about their nice stuff. My goal was to find some nice funtiture for my office and maybe, just maybe, replacing some of my old books with new ones that people had heard of. Sure enough they really did really, really cheap stuff. I was all set to order and on a total whim I decided to see what customers had said about Overstock. Less than 50% approval rating. Ouch. Apparently they're able to mark things at 90% off because they don't have anyone actually sending out orders. It's a solid business model and if I had the guts to go into business for myself it's one I'd definitely steal. Sorry, it's a Saturday and I clearly have nothing to say.
    Posted May 20 2006, 06:22 PM by greysanatomy with no comments
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  • Gorillaz: Feel Good Inc.

    With TV season finally over I can go back to writing about music. Although classically trained I do enjoy a healthy amount of non-Schubert (if you can believe that). I was riding to lunch with my friend's boyfriend and he had a mix CD playing. One of the songs on it was the Gorillaz's Feel Good Inc. As far as I knew the only Gorillaz song out there was Clint Eastwood. I remember that song distinctly because they advertised it like an infomercial. I did some reading on Gorillaz and it looks like they were formed by someone from the One-Hit Wonder Band Blur (remember Song 2?) Anyway, it's a pretty good song and I downloaded it last night. I haven't really listened to it compulsively as I like to do (on repeat for hours on end) since last night was poker night but I plan to give it a solid couple of hours this coming weekend. --Update-- Wow. There are a lot of versions of this song. It's not THAT good to really merit SIX remixes but whatever. On the off chance you're looking for one, here are the audio links: Original (audio) Radio Mix (audio) Instrumental Mix (audio) Acapella Mix (audio) Single Edit (audio) Crossfade Mix (audio) (My God greysmusic, that's a little ridiculous).
    Posted May 19 2006, 01:40 PM by greysanatomy with no comments
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  • Will and Grace Series Finale

    I have to admit that I never really watched Will and Grace. Jamie watched it here and there and I always rolled my eyes and walked away when she was hogging the couch watching it. Anyway, I feel since I've seen a good maybe 70-100 minutes of the show in my life I'm allowed to comment on some of the things I've learned. 1) If you're ugly you can rule out being gay. 2) If you're overweight you can rule out being gay. 3) If you're unskilled you can rule out being gay. 4) If you're not succeessful you can rule out being gay. 5) If you're ugly, overweight, unskilled or unsuccessful they will kick you out of their elitest club. I guess the point of the show is: pray to god your kids are homos or else they'll never get anywhere in life (or be fat and ugly). Thanks Will and Grace!
    Posted May 18 2006, 02:50 PM by greysanatomy with no comments
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