Look at the title, can any of you tell me where the sentence is from and what it is? If so, the first right answer in the comment section will get a great prize! And, the more supporting information that goes along with your answer will earn you extra credit. Such a deal! I'll give you a hint: I didn't make it up; this is real. Ready, set, go.
And now, an answer to my adoring fans (well, fan) out there in blogland. A question that was asked regarding my last blog concerning marbles, and the loss thereof. You see, "losing all your marbles", I believe, comes from the game of "marbles" wherein each player starts with a bag of marbles. A circle is drawn on the ground and each player places one of his marbles inside the circle. Each player then "shoots" his next marble using the thumb and index finger, and tries to knock the existing marble, or marbles, out of the circle. A successful hit will drive a competitor's marble outside the circle. The shooter now owns that marble and he continues to shoot until he misses, whereupon the next shooter takes his turn. Similar to popular card games, the tension builds as players win, or lose, money, or marbles. In the marble game, when you lose all your marbles, you have nothing to play with anymore and your stress levels undoubtedly are very high. So, to "lose all your marbles" could reasonably cause you to go insane. That's what I think anyway. Another related story concerns the seashore scenario mentioned in my last blog. This is a true story. There was an orator in ancient Greece (I'm not sure of his name) who would practice his public speaking at the seashore by putting pebbles in his mouth and then he would speak over the sounds of the Mediterranean Sea. He kept practicing with the pebbles because it was difficult to enunciate and this required him to form his words carefully to be understood. The sounds of the sea required him to develop his lung power so that he could project his message to the last person in the amphitheater. Thus, the orator, through this practice, was much sought after because he was able to relate his message clearly. Quite a commentary on the ancient civilizations. They used simple techniques and rudimentary speaking platforms. No amplifiers, speakers, or microphones. They used what Nature provided. They developed their talents; we "modern folks" waste our talents and try to cheat by using technology as a substitute. Time to send my toga to the cleaners; beam me up Scotty, there's no intelligent life down here.
And now, let's talk trees. This morning, before coffee, I stepped out into the backyard to let the dogs run and to admire our freshly cut grass. It looks like a golf green after it has been trimmed and I was satisfied as I viewed the sweeping vista before me until I turned to the left and saw a fifty foot tree broken in half and laying precariously in my yard. I didn't hear anything fall during the night so I was shocked to see this eighteen inch thick tree marring the landscape. Okay, a little background to help you understand the situation.
My property line is next to a vacant, thirty acre lot. It's owned by a private person, but he's never done anything with the land. There are huge trees, some a few inches from my yard and some about ten feet from my house. Simple arithmetic will show that a fifty-sixty foot tree standing ten feet from my house constitutes a danger to my abode. Especially when this particular tree died from vines encircling it. It started to rot and to drop branches within a few feet of the house. I contacted the owner and informed him of what was happening to his tree, and the danger to my house. He was unconcerned. I then wrote a letter, certified, yada,yada, telling him that, if the tree fell in my yard, or on my house, that he was liable and that I would certainly sue him because he refused to do anything about it. I documented everything with photographs, put all my copies together, and forgot about it. This was about three years ago. About one year ago, I came home from work and discovered that a large tree, also next to my fence, but about a hundred feet away from the rotting tree, was cut down. I can't imagine why these morons cut down a tree that was no where near my house and left a rotting tree, which threatens my property, standing. I think the term "dumb redneck" aptly applies.
Shortly after the time when I sent the letter to him, I sensed that he would rather be sued then to take care of the problem, so I opted to take some precautions myself. What good, I reasoned, is it to have the tree crush my house so that I would have to sue him, and of course we know that the courts are on the side of the criminals, so there would be no satisfaction, I would still end up with a crushed house that would have to be fixed. I thought it better to be proactive. I took a heavy rope and tied it about a third of the way up the tree and then secured it to another of his trees in such a way, that if the unthinkable happened, that the rope would cause the tree to swing away from the house. Well, the unthinkable did happen, and my rope worked perfectly. The tree broke and folded over itself. It even spared my four foot fence. Now, I'll spend the next two-three days chopping the vines and branches to clean the mess from my yard. But, at least the house is no longer in danger from this particular tree.
The clean up will be long and arduous. I'll take all the refuse and dump on his land, of course. The base of the tree still stands about twenty feet high, and the rope is still supporting it, but it is angled severely away from the house, so I'm somewhat relieved.
I have found that a two-handed axe is the best tool to deal with trees. If I had a heavy duty chain saw that would be a big help, but the venerable axe seems to be the best overall. Saws, especially in wet wood, bind terribly, whereas the axe has no such problems. Of course, you have to provide the horsepower from your muscles to be successful, no lazy way to use an axe. And, you would be surprised at how heavy wood can be. A tree of this size probably weighs close to two thousand pounds - more if it is saturated (it is). This means that I will have to chop it into smaller pieces so that I can carry each piece away. There are no shortage of vines; they cover every part of this tree and I think that they were holding the tree together for the last two years. I feel like Tarzan as I hack through all the branches and vines. This morning it took almost two hours to clear away the vines so that I could see the main trunk. Then I had to find what was supporting the tree and then I had to decide how to cause it to slow fall to the ground so that it wouldn't crash into the fence. Fortunately, I was successful with these things and the tree creaked slowly down to the ground. Then I started to clear the hundreds of vines still clinging to it. When I finally get everything cleared away, I will start chopping the main part of the tree that is sitting in my yard. The remaining part that is still standing on his side of the fence, I will leave there, hoping that it will fall one day, on his moronic, redneck head.
It rained, no, poured, this morning, so I had to take a break. I didn't want my twenty foot aluminum ladder to attract any of those lightning bolts - my luck runs that way. And you can bet that I had an extra cup of coffee this morning. One should never have to do this kind of work before coffee. Nothing in life happens before coffee!
Has anyone come up with an answer to my original query? Do you want another hint? He is very famous. Oops, I almost gave it away, I wouldn't want to ruin the surprise so I won't reveal any more hints right now. By the way, what do you guys suggest for great prizes? And, what about second and third prizes? In point of fact, I don't know how many blog readers we have out there. If I offer three prizes, then everyone might get a prize. Get it? Only three blog readers? Maybe I should require that everyone has to comment before I will grant a first prize. I know, I'll give the first prize to the longest comment, and of course, all blog readers in the office have to comment too. Oh yeah, no fair in cutting and pasting Bible Reader as your comment. You will have to come up with original comments to win. So, the rules are, everyone must comment and then the prize will go to the longest comment. Ready, set, go. Isn't this fun! So says Sam Post.
